The New Year

Well, it's another New Year.
Now a new year has never really been that big a deal for me or my family,
We don't throw a party or anything, it's basically just another day.

It's honestly been that way for almost any holiday, yeah a holiday is "fun" and only happens once a year.
But they aren't that special to me, it's just another day.
Maybe that's because my family mostly consist of myself, my sister, my mom and well I should say my dad.
But eh.
The rest of the family we hardly hear from, for years no one called, no letters.
But I don't really mind, I guess when you grow up that way it doesn't seem like that big a deal.
Maybe I'm just not a very big holiday person.

But anyway, this year is hopefully going to be different. I'm planning on getting my shit together so I can actually do some things.
I'm tired of being trapped so I'm going to have to un-trap myself.

I'm honestly not really looking forward to college, it's got to be done or so people keep telling me but I am not really looking forward to it.
I'm a shy, quiet, reserved kind of person.
Dealing with people isn't one of my favorite pass times...
I can do it, I'm polite and such, I just don't like to do it.
I feel, awkward about it?

A lot of people just tell me that I'm worrying too much and I just need to walk up to someone and be like "Hellooo!"
And all I can do is give them a look.
If they want to walk up to someone and just say hi and start off a conversation with a complete stranger then they can be my guest.

I'm working on not being as reserved but it's still difficult.
I'm just not an outgoing person, I either never learned how to be or that's just me.
We're all got our quirks, right?
I can be fun as hell, it just takes time to crack my shell.

So let's hope this year goes better than the past few, shall we?